The Affliction Inside

Debuting at Brick Nite located at Blue Star Art Complex this recently completed painting makes the sum of the whole of my journey experiencing Stage 4 Endometriosis. I originally started this painting back in early January of 2024 with the ideas of exploring my struggles with physical health issues that were affecting me from the inside. At the time I was diagnosed with the possibility of endometriosis but had unclear answers. I was becoming frustrated from the pain and the extreme menstrual periods I would experience that would impact my daily life and relationship that worsened over time. The painting came to a standstill for about nine months until June 6th, 2025 when I underwent a hysterectomy that would permanently alter me physically and mentally.
Florals are a big part of my work as a painter and oftentimes I will put marigolds. Symbolically marigolds are a rich thriving cultural flower that is associated with grief, remembrances and transition from life to death. I often depict grief as quiet and sometimes almost at a floating standstill. I believe grief can come in many forms, especially for oneself. I grieve a body that oftentimes felt like it was dying of its own accord without my say in it. Grieving that my life was being taken over by an illness that only seemed to be getting worse as time went by. 

Medical scissors are purposefully trimming away at slow paced decaying leaves, they're sterile and cold. The opposite of the warm and dry surrounding environment. The silent need and desperation for control and advocating for my own body to be fixed and healed. The floating leaves in the shape of an everchanging uterus. 

My nakedness as a display of vulnerability. I was constantly exposing myself for treatment and inspections by countless doctors to be poked, prodded, insertion of needles and more. 

This painting holds a lot of remembrance of the struggles I encountered and my silent strength of resilience that despite all my pain and sickness I was able to overcome it and start my life anew.